Isaac Glen arrived on May 20th. He weighed 8 pounds and was 20 inches long. He is a happy baby and we have enjoyed getting to spend our summer with him getting to know who he is.
So here is Isaac.
Showing posts with label God's love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label God's love. Show all posts
Monday, August 10, 2015
He Answers Prayers
The Summer always flies by. It is, by far, my favorite time of year. Not because I like the season (not my favorite season at all), but because summer is the time I get to do the things I love the most. I get to be home with my kids, loving on them, playing games with them, doing summer things. I get to be a wife who isn't distracted by work, who can support her husband in ministry more. I get to sew and craft and clean and organize. I love summer!! But this summer, well this summer was extra special! We got to meet our little Isaac. After a long and crazy pregnancy, he has arrived.
Isaac Glen arrived on May 20th. He weighed 8 pounds and was 20 inches long. He is a happy baby and we have enjoyed getting to spend our summer with him getting to know who he is.
So here is Isaac.
He such a wonderful little addition to our family. He is happy and cuddly and loves his mommy!
So many prayers were answered the day we gave birth to him. I had feared that I would struggle to feel the extreme joy of giving birth to Isaac and instead be overwhelmed with sadness that his twin wasn't here with him.
The moment I looked up and saw the doctor holding him for me to see, I was overcome with such joy and a peace that I know came from God. I shed a couple tears but really they were tears of joy, me and Isaac made it, we had a crazy weird road together but he was here and in my arms. My arms were full.
I felt joy that I got to have one of my babies to hold when so many women don't get to hold even one of theirs. The miracle of birth is truly that, a miracle!
He had every little piece...ten fingers...ten toes...he was Fearfully and Wonderfully made.
The feeling that someone was missing from our family will never go away for me, I will always miss Jonah. But the gift of Isaac has given our family peace. The kids still pray for him and ask about him but the tears are gone. They have joy for Jonah and were he is, knowing one day they will see him.
God answered another prayer for me that day. I had prayed, since the day Jonah passed, that when it came time to give birth that I would be able to see Jonah. My doctor told me the likelihood was small. But God heard my cry, God gave me some closure that day. Jonah wasn't just some piece of tissue, or a set of black wave lines on a sonogram photo, he was a person, he was small, but there was no denying he was a baby.
The day of Isaac's birth will always be remembered (for me anyway) as an emotional one, but a good one, one were God showed me that he does answer prayer, that He does love me, that He loves my husband and children and that in the midst of our pain, HE can give us unspeakable joy and a peace that surpasses all understanding.
Welcome to our family Isaac, welcome to the world. I can't wait to see the journey your life will take and the plans God has for you! You are loved more than you know!
Isaac Glen arrived on May 20th. He weighed 8 pounds and was 20 inches long. He is a happy baby and we have enjoyed getting to spend our summer with him getting to know who he is.
So here is Isaac.
Tuesday, May 19, 2015
My Hearts Prayer
Words and feelings get trapped inside of my head. I want them out, but I know God has me sitting still in this place, in His presence, processing these feelings with me. He wants to heal my hurt, heal my heart, and although I want God to do that, I find myself struggling to let Him. Why do I hold onto it? I don't like it but I find myself stuffing all these feelings about my hurt away. If I can stuff it and pretend it away, and busy my hands and mind with other things, then I don't have to feel...but eventually the busy goes away and gets taken care of and then I am left in the quiet again. It is then I realize all those feelings are still there, just below the surface.
Healing hurts, it means I have to admit that everything that happened is real, that one of my sons died before I had the chance to see him or touch him. That my Isaac will be born a singleton, never having met his twin brother on this side of the womb. That Chris and I will not get to watch Jonah grow into a man of God. That Kinlee won't have a 3rd brother to mess with (we all know she is really in charge!). That Ethan won't be able to share his love of God and golf with Jonah.
It hurts to be vulnerable and allow the God of the universe to tear away the bandages that have held my heart together, and let Him touch and heal the wounds that lay there. I need to be open and vulnerable to others when they ask how I am and how I feel about giving birth so soon, instead of hiding my true feelings. If I truly trust that my God is the God of the universe and He is in control, I need to walk in faith that He knows the why of Jonah not being here and I need to rest in that and have faith that I will be ok, that we all will be okay.
Lord heal my heart, give me courage and strength to be vulnerable; be with us all as we prepare to welcome our precious Isaac into this world! Prepare my heart to feel both the intense joy of having Isaac and also the grief of Jonah's absence. Give us your peace Lord.
~Amen
Healing hurts, it means I have to admit that everything that happened is real, that one of my sons died before I had the chance to see him or touch him. That my Isaac will be born a singleton, never having met his twin brother on this side of the womb. That Chris and I will not get to watch Jonah grow into a man of God. That Kinlee won't have a 3rd brother to mess with (we all know she is really in charge!). That Ethan won't be able to share his love of God and golf with Jonah.
It hurts to be vulnerable and allow the God of the universe to tear away the bandages that have held my heart together, and let Him touch and heal the wounds that lay there. I need to be open and vulnerable to others when they ask how I am and how I feel about giving birth so soon, instead of hiding my true feelings. If I truly trust that my God is the God of the universe and He is in control, I need to walk in faith that He knows the why of Jonah not being here and I need to rest in that and have faith that I will be ok, that we all will be okay.
Lord heal my heart, give me courage and strength to be vulnerable; be with us all as we prepare to welcome our precious Isaac into this world! Prepare my heart to feel both the intense joy of having Isaac and also the grief of Jonah's absence. Give us your peace Lord.
~Amen
Sunday, January 18, 2015
A father's heart
Dear Jonah,
Today is a hard day, it’s been the toughest day I’ve ever experienced, it’s a day I wish I never had to face. Today I had to say goodbye to you, my son, for now. Although you only had a short time here in your mother’s womb, there’s still so much I know about you and so much to celebrate about your life.
Even though I never got to see you, I know you are beautiful, because you are created by God, and I can’t wait for the day when I will see your face.
Even though I never heard your voice, I will know it when I do, and we will have long conversations together.
Even Though I never held you, I know there will be a day that we will enjoy a long embrace.
Even though you aren’t with us now, you will forever be part of our family.
Jonah, I want you to know that you are greatly loved. Your mother and I love you so much, I can’t even express it. Your brother and sister love you too, they have been praying for you every night. Your brother’s favorite Bible story has always been Jonah, and we knew that was your name even before you were here. There are so many other family and friends who love you also that they’re too numerous to list. I also want you to know that your twin brother is doing well, and we promise to take good care of him until we are all united again.
My heart aches that I can’t be with you right now, and I’m angry that death took you sooner than I expected. But I’m comforted by our Lord, and I have the Hope of Glory because of our savior Jesus Christ, who conquered death! Death is no longer the end for us, and it overwhelms me with joy to know that you are experiencing His victory and glory right now—which we will one day enjoy together.
Today is a hard day, it’s been the toughest day I’ve ever experienced, it’s a day I wish I never had to face. Today I had to say goodbye to you, my son, for now. Although you only had a short time here in your mother’s womb, there’s still so much I know about you and so much to celebrate about your life.
Even though I never got to see you, I know you are beautiful, because you are created by God, and I can’t wait for the day when I will see your face.
Even though I never heard your voice, I will know it when I do, and we will have long conversations together.
Even Though I never held you, I know there will be a day that we will enjoy a long embrace.
Even though you aren’t with us now, you will forever be part of our family.
Jonah, I want you to know that you are greatly loved. Your mother and I love you so much, I can’t even express it. Your brother and sister love you too, they have been praying for you every night. Your brother’s favorite Bible story has always been Jonah, and we knew that was your name even before you were here. There are so many other family and friends who love you also that they’re too numerous to list. I also want you to know that your twin brother is doing well, and we promise to take good care of him until we are all united again.
My heart aches that I can’t be with you right now, and I’m angry that death took you sooner than I expected. But I’m comforted by our Lord, and I have the Hope of Glory because of our savior Jesus Christ, who conquered death! Death is no longer the end for us, and it overwhelms me with joy to know that you are experiencing His victory and glory right now—which we will one day enjoy together.
Jonah, I love you so much and I can’t wait to be with you again.
- Love Dad.
“When my soul fainted within me,
I remembered the Lord;
And my prayer went up to You,
Into Your holy temple.”
- Jonah 2:7
- Love Dad.
“When my soul fainted within me,
I remembered the Lord;
And my prayer went up to You,
Into Your holy temple.”
- Jonah 2:7
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
LOVE
What is LOVE? It is such a popular word. People love to sing about it, talk about it write about it. You hear the word love all the time. But what does it really mean.
Our society (especially my generation and younger) seems to think that love means there is no wrong. If I love the person I can't tell them I dislike their action or that I think their action is wrong. If you love you must accept it all. I beg to differ. The Bible shows us that there is different types of love, and before I had children I honestly didn't understand the different types of love. Well I knew them, read about them, but I just didn't have full knowledge of them. Having my kids has taught me more about God's love, than I think anyone can. I love my kids more than I can imagine, I honestly think I would jump in front of a bus for them (I hope I don't have to though). And even though I would risk my life for them, there are times when I have to correct them. It doesn't mean I don't love them, it just means that their behavior is not acceptable and I need to correct/instruct firmly but with love. I correct because I love them and want them to grow up and turn into wonderful adults who are respectful, moral, God loving men and women. If I didn't correct them, they would turn into absolute brats. That's what happens when you let a three year old do whatever it is that makes them happy.
I am honestly tired of hearing people defend their behavior by bringing up love..."shouldn't we all just love people." Yes we should and I love people, but that does not mean I have to accept every one's behavior. The bottom line is we are all sinners, we have all done things unpleasing in the eyes of God and yet due to his amazing and wonderful GRACE I am still saved, he still loves me, but he does not like the sin. I love Ethan but when I tell him to stop running in the house and he does it anyway, he gets a punishment. It doesn't change how much I love him, it just means that it can be dangerous for him to run in the house. He can fall and hurt himself (which in his case can be very serious), or he could hurt his young sister. I am correcting his action to protect him (and his sister), not because I don't love him.
I just don't understand the argument that if it has to do with love then it can't be wrong. Some people love to do drugs, so should we make that legal, by all means if it makes them happy and they love it then who am I to say no. If two young teens want to have premarital sex because they "love" each other, really we should just let that slide and watch the statistics of sexually transmitted disease, teen pregnancy, and abortion go up. Just because you love doesn't make it okay and safe and healthy for us and just because I disagree with your behavior and choices doesn't mean I love you less, it just means that I don't like/love your behavior. God commands us to love our neighbor as ourselves, but he does not command us to love the sin and God's word clear in the things we should not do and that are sin. The Bible is also clear and says to "go and sin no more." John 8:11. Not go and keep doing the behavior you have been doing because it makes you happy and I love you and so since I love you I don't want to tell you you are sinning. No He made it clear AND SIN NO MORE. God loves us all, but God hates sin. He can't even be in the presence of sin and it is only by Jesus shedding his blood and covering us do we get to receive the GRACE.
Our society (especially my generation and younger) seems to think that love means there is no wrong. If I love the person I can't tell them I dislike their action or that I think their action is wrong. If you love you must accept it all. I beg to differ. The Bible shows us that there is different types of love, and before I had children I honestly didn't understand the different types of love. Well I knew them, read about them, but I just didn't have full knowledge of them. Having my kids has taught me more about God's love, than I think anyone can. I love my kids more than I can imagine, I honestly think I would jump in front of a bus for them (I hope I don't have to though). And even though I would risk my life for them, there are times when I have to correct them. It doesn't mean I don't love them, it just means that their behavior is not acceptable and I need to correct/instruct firmly but with love. I correct because I love them and want them to grow up and turn into wonderful adults who are respectful, moral, God loving men and women. If I didn't correct them, they would turn into absolute brats. That's what happens when you let a three year old do whatever it is that makes them happy.
I am honestly tired of hearing people defend their behavior by bringing up love..."shouldn't we all just love people." Yes we should and I love people, but that does not mean I have to accept every one's behavior. The bottom line is we are all sinners, we have all done things unpleasing in the eyes of God and yet due to his amazing and wonderful GRACE I am still saved, he still loves me, but he does not like the sin. I love Ethan but when I tell him to stop running in the house and he does it anyway, he gets a punishment. It doesn't change how much I love him, it just means that it can be dangerous for him to run in the house. He can fall and hurt himself (which in his case can be very serious), or he could hurt his young sister. I am correcting his action to protect him (and his sister), not because I don't love him.
I just don't understand the argument that if it has to do with love then it can't be wrong. Some people love to do drugs, so should we make that legal, by all means if it makes them happy and they love it then who am I to say no. If two young teens want to have premarital sex because they "love" each other, really we should just let that slide and watch the statistics of sexually transmitted disease, teen pregnancy, and abortion go up. Just because you love doesn't make it okay and safe and healthy for us and just because I disagree with your behavior and choices doesn't mean I love you less, it just means that I don't like/love your behavior. God commands us to love our neighbor as ourselves, but he does not command us to love the sin and God's word clear in the things we should not do and that are sin. The Bible is also clear and says to "go and sin no more." John 8:11. Not go and keep doing the behavior you have been doing because it makes you happy and I love you and so since I love you I don't want to tell you you are sinning. No He made it clear AND SIN NO MORE. God loves us all, but God hates sin. He can't even be in the presence of sin and it is only by Jesus shedding his blood and covering us do we get to receive the GRACE.
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