God is good in ALL things-a testimony

I have been in a very reflective mood lately; maybe it is the thanksgiving holiday, maybe it is all the changes that have been going on around here or maybe it is me just getting older, either way I have been reflecting and have been overwhelmed by God's love, grace, faithfulness and sovereignty. 

I am sure that the journey to now started a very, very long time ago, but I want to look back about seven years ago (yes I know it is a long journey and if you don't want to read it all that's fine, I really just want to get the story/testimony down and out of my head so as to not be forgotten).  Chris and I were just married.  At that time we did not have a regular church to attend.  We just sort of bounced from one to another trying them out and never really found one that felt right.  After some coaching from some friends of ours, we traveled from Point Loma to east county San Diego to attend their church; about a 30 minute drive.   We liked the church, a lot!  Over the next couple months, we went there off and on but would only commit to "visiting." It was too far to make this our home church.  Within a month we ended up buying a condo in east county, not in our original plan (and frankly seemed a bit sudden).  The church became our home church.

We kept from getting too involved though. We had planned to leave the San Diego area (we figured it was very expensive to live here and would not be able to afford it) as soon as I graduated from grad school.  The time came, I graduated and despite applying all over the place the only offers that came in were here in San Diego.  The job I got was at a top district, I thought the interview was horrendous and cried at my performance once I got in my car, and yet somehow I got the job.  The same day I accepted the job Chris was offered a job at a big ad agency, he had not been looking for a new job, they contacted him.  We figured God had something in mind so we stayed.

The youth pastor at our small church left; at the time there really wasn't any kids.  Eventually a few boys started coming.  Chris and I talked about working with youth, but felt that at that time it was unrealistic and we could not devote the attention it deserved.  At the time Chris was working about 60-80 hours a week.  Another guy stepped up in the ministry spot.  I got pregnant, was put on bedrest.  The youth group grew.  The guy asked Chris to help him out here and there and to plan the winter retreat.  I had Ethan, we praised God for keeping us here, close to a fabulous children's hospital that has specialists there for his exact diagnosis (there isn't alot of them).  Ethan was only a few weeks old when we went on the first winter retreat with the youth.  Eventually Chris' role in the youth group got bigger and bigger.  When Ethan was 6 months old my babysitter (can I call you that Silla? you were and are so much more) moved.  Chris' Ad job took him away from home a lot, he and rarely saw Ethan and me, and he had to work on Sunday's quite a bit.  After much discussion and prayer we felt that it was time Chris quit his job and opened his own business from home.  So Chris became a stay at home dad and worked on building his own design business and got more involved in church.

Eventually Chris became the head of the youth group.  He went to the youth pastors conference and came home and told me that he felt God was giving him this calling, it wasn't just him helping out anymore.  I felt the same but feared saying it out loud.  I knew too many pastors kids who had become prodigal children, I didn't think I could handle that, in my mind we were just helping out and that was all I wanted to commit to.  The pastor and his wife invited me (and Chris encouraged me) to go to the pastor's wives conference.  I resisted for a bit, but after praying I took the time off work to go.  I was humbled.  Lady after lady got up and spoke about their prodigal children or the tragedies their families faced in ministry (the overall theme was that God is good in ALL things!).  I heard about these kids who died tragically, or got wrapped up in drugs and alcohol, all the things that I was afraid of.  I prayed, I cried and in the end knew that I had to admit that God is good in all things and that God was calling us to ministry.  I came home and we talked about it and we continued to work with our youth kids waiting for specific direction from God.

A tragedy hit our Church family and rocked Chris and I to our core about 6 months after that.  Chris and I had an honest conversation about getting out of ministry.  In my human mind I didn't think God could redeem the situation.  So many people were hurt and broken it would be easier to walk away and forget that it all ever happened.  But in my spirit I felt comfort in the crisis.  I can't explain it, I knew that some how some way good would come from it, God would be glorified and we needed to press on.  It was a time of great emotional conflict. 

It has been a year and a half since the tragedy.  In that time we were in a holding pattern waiting on God and what He would bring.  It was a time to be still and listen and know that He is God.  I can tell you God has indeed been glorified.  The negative things that everyone thought would happening as a result didn't occur.  The church is stronger today than it ever has been and is growing.  It is different than it had been but God has been glorified in ways that were unimaginable. 

About 6 months ago, after lots of prayer and counsel we felt that God was us...to more ministry.  We weren't sure what that meant at the time, and still don't totally know.  We just know we are open vessels for Christ.  Two weeks ago our church added staff members to it (prior to now there has only been one staff person, the pastor), Chris was added to the staff on a part time basis.  It has been awesome to see where the Lord has taken us in these last seven years and how God's hand was in it all.  We don't know what the future holds, we are looking to God for guidance and waiting for Him to direct the rest of our path.  Who knows, maybe one day Chris will be in full time ministry with his family serving by his side to God's glory.  I am truly humbled by the things God has done for my family and I can honestly say that God is good in ALL things.  I have seen it!

This week

Wow this has been insane week.  I can't believe all the things that have happened in the last 6-7 days. 
Here it is in a  nutshell:
1. Traded in the Jeep for a Mini-Van.  Got a killer deal on a Honda
2. Had Kinlee's dedication
3. attended two church services on Sunday and Chris taught youth group
4. Hosted both sides of the family for Kinlee's dedication lunch (those who know me well, know that this is draining for me...I am not a big group kind of person; very out of my comfort zone)
5. Changed banks and also got a different car loan for the van and cut our payments by 100 bucks.
6. Ethan's leg "randomly" started hurting and eventually he lost all mobility resulting in a 24 hour stay at Children's with a joint bleed in the knee.  24 hour meds for the next 3 days.  Trying to keep an active three year old still
7. wrote a psych report at 2 am (after leaving hospital)
8. attended an IEP meeting via phone (for the psych report written at 2am)
9. Chris taught 2 classes
10. Chris had first staff meeting at Calvary Chapel as the youth pastor (that's right I said staff!)
11. Kinlee got her first tooth and the second is just below the surface
12. Drove (40 minutes away) the new car loan check to the dealer to pay off the original loan
13. Worked three days this week (took at day of when E was in hospital and Friday is a holiday)
14. attempted to clean the house (not totally done yet)
15. Made gifts for a baby shower


I am very tired and so is Chris.  We are having trouble processing all the stuff.  Lots of awesomeness and then some pretty bad lows!  But man oh man I wouldn't trade this week for anything!  God is sovereign everything that happened this week, the good and the bad, are for His glory.  We praise Him for this week!

And eventually I might get in to blog about a few of these specific things.

Oh yea and Kinlee had her 6 month photos.  Thank you to Auntie Sam for taking her photos.  Love them

from the eyes of a three year old

Tonight when I was getting ready to feed Kinlee, Ethan asked if he could take some photos with my camera.  He loves to take photos.  This is a photo stream of what he took tonight.  10 minutes in our house from the eyes of a three and a half year old.

Please excuse our messy house.  :)

 

 Kinlee's favorite "toy"

 My feet

 Ethan's hand

 Our nook (Silla- that's the tub with the scrapbook items from our Christmas album, hahaha)

 Wow our table is a mess

  Dad's office

 Door in daddy's office

 daddy's office from another angle

 office chair

 our wood floor

 my desk

 Ethan's foot (he thought this was funny)

Such a cutie patootie, my big boy is.  His photos did show me how much I need to clean though.  I really need more hours in my day!  What did you do tonight?

The Threadery

As further proof that I am embracing my crafty side, I give you The Threadery!

I am so excited.  After years of trying to convince my mom that she has a God given talent that she should shared with more than just her kids, grandchildren and their friends, she has finally realized this and agreed to be a vendor at a handmade, vintage market.  The catch was that I had to do it with her.  This posed a slight problem as I didn't know what sort of a craft I could come up with.  Well what will I be selling you ask...coasters!  I made a bunch of cute little coasters that I am sure everyone will need for their home.  Oh and I also helped mom come up with her both design.  My mom is selling all sorts of her beautiful sew goods (mostly baby and children's items).  I am not so good at the sewing yet.  Although I have sewn two things with my new, vintage sewing machine.  I guess I should blog about those soon.  I need more time! 

Back to The Threadery, it is in the north orange county area and we will be selling as Bethadee Zoo.  If you live in the area, or you just want to come on down, please come check it out.  There is going to be some great vendors there.  Hope to see you this Saturday! 

Laundry Detergent

I have recently become addicted to pinterest.  It is a wonderful virtual corkboard where I have found lots of wonderful craft ideas.  My mother tried for 18 years to open up my crafty side and I resisted, a whole 30 years.  Well now I am all about it. 

One day while looking around pinterest I found a do-it-yourself laundry detergent.  After a few days of thinking about it I decided to do it.  I have a couple people in my family with VERY sensitive skin and laundry detergent is expensive.  So I decided to do it, even though some members of my family thought it was a bit odd.    

The ingredients can all be found at you local Walmart in the laundry aisle.  All together it was about $8 for all the ingredients, but the Borax and the Baking and Washing Soda would make way more batches.  I am estimating that this the Borax, Baking and Washing soda containers I bought will last me a year.  That is a huge savings over a $15 bottle of tide, plus it doesn't have all those additives! 

1 bar Fels-Naptha bar soap
1 cup Borax
1 cup Washing Soda
1/4 cup Baking Soda

 Grate the Fels-Naptha Bar.  I used a cheese grated, but you can use a food processor or a Magic bullet. 

 Add all the ingredients and stir. 

 Then find a cute glass jar (okay any container really) and put it in the laundry room (please ignore my dinged up Dryer in the photo, it was a craigslist purchase). 

You only need about 2 tablespoons for a load of laundry.  So although this doesn't look like a ton, it will last a long time.  It smells good too.  It has a really clean, slight hint of lemon to it.  And it was super easy to make.  It only took about 10 minutes and that was only because I kept getting distracted by the kids. 

I have made a few other projects I have gotten from pinterest.  But more on that later. 

A Parent's Love

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As I sat at the red light waiting for it to turn green, he asked me why he was going with me to his sister’s doctors appointment. I reminded him that he had a hurt arm and that we had to go to his doctor too. He immediately knew what that meant and as I turned around to look him straight in the eyes he had tears in his eyes and told me he didn't want to go to get pokie's (shots). My eyes started to tear up as I told him how sorry I was, but that this was what was best for him. A single tear ran down my cheek and I told him it would be okay that he would get his shot of medicine and then his arm would be better and we go about our day as normal.

This wasn't the first time he needed to get meds, no there have been many other times before. This wasn't the first time I teared up about having to have my son get shots to treat the hemophilia, no there were many other times before. But this was the first time I cried in front of him. I am always careful not to get emotional about his "ouchies." I don't want him to freak out; I have always waited until after the treatment is over and he has gone to bed to cry. He is looking to me, to see my reaction. At his age, my reaction will dictate how he will react. He is looking to me to keep him safe. He is looking to me for love and to make him feel secure in every situation that we face. It is my job.

As I went about the rest of the day, I couldn't help but think about God and how hard it must be for Him to love us so much that He has to put us through the refiners fire to make us whole and pure in Him. That pure perfect love, when you don't just stand there watching someone do something you know is not good for them, but instead you gently tell them what they need to hear. Maybe they need to know how their actions will impact their life, or how their actions impact others life's. All to often I think we are too quick to nod our head and smile, instead of offering instruction and guidance, true love.

Our son trusts his daddy and I to protect him and take care of him. Unfortunately it sometimes mean we have to restrict him, or we have to take him to get pokies because his body needs the medicine. He doesn't like it, it makes him sad. But maybe he occasionally needs to see that mommy and daddy are just as sad about his ouchies as he is. I trust God has the best for me and sometimes it is good to be reminded that He sheds tears for me.

Jumperoo

Kinlee at four months of age enjoying her jumperoo for the first time.


Ethan at 5 months enjoying his jumperoo at for the first time.
They are both so cute and I think they look so much alike and yet so totally different. How is that? Amazing! Oh and if you can't quite tell from these photos, she has is about five pounds more than he was at the same age. She is growing so fast! Well Ethan also grew pretty slow and still grows slow. Maybe because he doesn't eat much. hum.....